Spectator’s Recap: Ironman New York.

Saturday was the inaugural Ironman U.S. Championships held right here in the city so nice they named it twice. 140.6 miles encompassing the Hudson River, Palisades, 9w Parkway, George Washington Bridge, and Riverside Park.

That was Saturday. It’s now Tuesday (right?) and I’m finally coming out of my post-Ironman spectating coma to write a recap sprinkled with pretty pictures. I’m sorry for the delay. Cheering for loved ones for 21 hours and then drinking for what felt like 21 hours the very next day will leave you in a haze.

Let’s carry on. I apologize in advance for the lengthy post. I’ve stated before, spectating an Ironman is an all-day affair. But a GLORIOUS time, indeed.

His Lordship has been training for IMNY since January. He took a very short break after Ironman Arizona in November, and was ready to take his battle stations regardless of the heat, humidity, and the freak sewage spill which did not deter the 2.4 mile swim from being canceled. (Really, it wasn’t freak. This shit happened last year a week before the NYC Triathlon. Also, I said shit. See what I did there?)

Race Day: a 4 a.m. wake-up call with our guest cheer cohort Claire Bear. Woof, that’s early. I opted for a shower bird bath to continue sleeping in an upright fashion wake up, while His Lordship got ready while staying insanely calm throughout the morning—probably the most calm I’ve ever seen any racer the morning of a race regardless of distance. And after a brief argument with our first cab driver, we took a cab to the start at Palisades Park in Fort Lee, New Jersey.

Fun Fact: Cabs charge a flat fee to get to New Jersey from Manhattan. Now you know.

As Claire and I didn’t have the necessary wristbands to walk His Lordship into transition, we bid him adieu, and meandered aimlessly around Fort Lee…in the wee morning hours. Nothing says ‘creepy’ like clown rides sitting in silence in an old amusement park at 5:45 in the morning. We procured coffee at a nearby Dunkin’ Donuts and sat. And sat some more. And then Claire made a statement:

“You weren’t kidding when you said that the start of the Ironman is…um…boring.”

Correct. And it’s a good thing we’re friends for that would make for an awkward time, indeed. In Arizona, Alex and I, too, sat in a nearby coffee shop. At least we were able to walk into Transition to see His Lordship come out of the swim and get onto his bike. This was going to be different. We couldn’t get to the start. Or into Transition due to our lack of wristbands. We walked a bit more to kill our three hours of time. Perhaps we could see some sort of start activity atop the GW Bridge? Incorrect, ladies, for the North side is closed for racers. Blast. This did not make for a spectator-friendly course.

View of Manhattan, and not any part of the race.

We walked back to the Palisades Park entrance to await His Lordship and Neal as they would make their exit and begin their bike journey. Also, there was a giant/nasty hill leaving the park, which makes for an interesting start of a 112-mile bike ride.

Thumbs up for a thumbs down incline.

To kill more time, Claire performed hill repeats (overachiever) while I laid on the pavement and ate brioche (realist). I was alerted by cheer squad/Runner Army member extraordinaire, Maria, that she was making her way over the GW to find us. So much support at 7:00 on a Saturday morning. I saw via the Ironman live blog that the Pros were exiting the water, and that the current was something fierce. Claire and I waited with foam finger and cow bell to cheer them on.

The lead men and women were killing it, and took charge up the hill like it was no problem (at least it looked that way from where we stood). Maria arrived and informed us of what Neal was wearing, and thank Christ as our eyes were crossing from reading so many bib numbers. Maria spotted His Lordship, who was looking ecstatic, weaving through competitors. Not long after was Neal, also looking fantastic, and I shouted something about him being a scientist. (Well, he is.)

Time to move the cheer squad to the bike turn around, which was a couple of miles up the street. Wetsuit stripper duo Susan and Jocelyn found us and told us of their morning (mmm delightful sewage splatter), and after we figured out that we were, in fact, in the complete wrong spot on the bike course, we walked further to the bike turn around on 9W. Our lack of directional skills made this a disaster, as the crowds were thick, and we had at least an hour and a half until we saw our men.

I’ve been told by both Ironmen and His Lordship’s coach that spectating on the bike is not the greatest idea, as it’s the longest portion of the day and you only see them for a matter of seconds. The best option is to rest and track the athlete and gear up for the marathon portion of the race. Ergo, the decision had been made—return to the Upper East Side for showers/rest/lunch before heading to Riverside Park to see the marathon.

Running over the GW Bridge was a new experience for Claire and I, and were delighted for the minimal incline and sweeping views of Manhattan and New Jersey. Unfortunately for us, we had the intention of running a solid 10 to 12 miles over the course of the day, and due to tiredness/hunger pains/spectating woes/and, was that a hangover?, we managed somewhere around 3. Whoops again.

After showers, tacos, and beers, as well as joining forces with more members of the Runner Army, we journeyed through Central Park and back to the West Side to await our menfolk at mile 22—a weird zigzagging loop through Riverside. I heard through the grapevine (a la Twitter) that His Lordship was seen coming over the GW Bridge. Attention! Be on the look out for a blonde gentleman wearing all red! Neal was just starting the marathon course at this time, so we kept an eye at how much time we had between them.

At this point in the day, Riverside Park was crawling with friends and family of our menfolk. ”WE SHOULD MAKE A POWER ARCH!,” exclaimed Maria. What a freaking fabulous idea, as we don’t normally get to do this for people running marathons. We were standing in a glorious spot on the course to do so!

Gearing up for the power arch.

And we did.

At mile 22, His Lordship ran through the power arch shouting and cheering, running effortlessly through Riverside. We ran up to the next part of the zigzag, and cheered him there (and he high-fived my Claire’s foam finger!), and moved on toward the finish. I made a quick decision of sprinting to the finish so not to miss him. Maria (who took her bike to the finish ahead of us) yelled at me, and I signalled for her toward the bleachers, hoping for a better shot and photo of the finish. We managed to crawl up under the bleachers and just in time to see him come through the finish. I started tearing, realizing that he was about to PR in a big way.

We crawled back from under the bleachers, met with fellow Bakers, and found him complete with medal and space cape. I didn’t even care about how much sweat (or fecal matter from the sewage spill) I was hugging.

“I broke 11 hours!”

Quite, sir. And by a long shot. His final time was 10:27:49; a beautiful PR from his first Ironman time of 11:13.

I received picture texts from His Lordship’s Mother, who was watching him via live stream on her iPad.

Photo courtesy of Janie!

Back to the East Side for showers and beers, and a brief celebration before heading back West to see Neal come through the finish.

Caught a Scientist!

More beers, more showers, pizza, and Champagne were endured until we took the ferry back to Jersey for bike retrieval.

There is something spectacular about cheering for an Ironman. A full day of watching your friends and family put in 140.6 hours of effort is truly worth while, and I’m proud to have been apart of this day of days.

Congratulations to all those who competed in this weekend’s race. And huge, HUGE congrats to our artist and scientist on their big day. You are Ironmen!

Calm night after a glorious day.

Recap: Hot Dog Challenge.

Yes, you read that right. The Great NY Hot Dog Challenge put on by the fabulous Rogue Runners was held on Saturday featuring 10 competitors with their eyes on the prize: over $200 in cash, and a sweet, SWEET medal.

The catch: Complete a 2.4 mile course throughout Manhattan, where 11 aid stations are in fact hot dog carts. Competitors must finish one hot dog (with whatever condiment of his/her choice) before proceeding to the next cart. No barfing allowed. Sounds simple enough, right?

Fun fact: Competitors reading this are most likely mentally slapping me in the face.

Competitors and refs gathered in Central Park where we went over the rules and regulations of the run. Initially, all runners were assigned a ref (I was paired with the elite Claire “Will Run for Beer OR Hot Dogs” Walsh), but we lost a few along the way, leaving refs to travel between competitors.

Bethaney is so excited.

Another fun factor of this race? The weather. We awoke to wet snow flurries on Saturday morning, which had the potential to pick up and keep some of the carts at bay. The snow stopped shortly before the high noon start, and it did keep two carts from setting up. Luckily, we moved the start to a cart near by, so the number of hot dogs eaten was to be 10.

Much shit talking and bet placing was had prior to the start, with eyes on Matt, Claire, Bojana, and Neal as forces to be reckoned with. After cart #3, Matt was holding the lead, giving me a huge thumbs up as he passed me on Park Avenue where Cart #4 was supposed to be. It was here that people started to divide. Apparently the buns were a problem for quite a few people. Gillian ran by me and said, “I’m out. I can’t do this anymore. I’m glad I gave it a shot.” Indeed, Gil. You ate more hot dogs than I.

At Cart #5 (in Baker’s Pass on 5th Ave.), Claire and Bethaney were shaken up.

“These taste awful. I might top out at six,” Claire said as she was slowly but surely taking in the water dog.

“This bread is gross. I wish I could just eat the dog,” Bethaney exclaimed while burping and chugging water.

It was here that TJ found he was lost. Using instincts instead of a map will not win you this race, Mr. Ryals. There are too many dog carts throughout Midtown Manhattan. I pointed TJ in the direction of the gauntlet, and Gillian and I decided to see where all the competitors were at. The Gauntlet—two carts on one block in the hub of 6th Ave—had a couple of competitors.

Jim (Dad Posse) said, “Abbe. This sucks. I’m going to kill your boyfriend.”

I wished him luck and bid him adieu to see who was ahead. And as I did that, TJ caught up with Jim. Neal was at the next cart, unwillingly forcing down his dog.

“They just keep tasting worse…” And as I left, TJ caught up with Neal.

Bojana was at the next cart looking strong.

“I’m the female lead!,” she exclaimed. Correct, B! Keep on truckin. You are a force to be reckoned with with your eating packs of dogs on your way home from work (true story).

Mmm...tasty.

The last four carts were on a stretch through Times Square. Let it be known that it was now approaching 1:00pm, meaning if any of our competitors had to puke it would most likely be on a tourist. I bet they didn’t expect that when visiting New York.

Gillian and I kept on to see who was in the lead. It seemed to be a close race with Matt Six and Dave Tao. I later found out that Six had a 2:00-3:00 lead over Dave until he hit a cart being inspected by a member of the NYPD. Whoops. I guess that’s a factor we didn’t consider. The finish was close indeed, but it was Dave Tao who took the esteemed title of Winner at this year’s Hot Dog Challenge.

Winner, winner. Please no hot dogs for dinner.

The finish (and after party) was held at Rudy’s, where patrons get free hot dogs for purchasing booze (hooray!).

Our map made the wall!

Congrats to all finishers, and to those who DNF’d for competing in this mayhem.  And special thanks to Miss Greenberg for being the official photographer of the race!

You are all heroes of America and challengers of encased meat.

Recap: Inaugural Baker’s Funtastic 4.

So. I had a long discussion on Friday with Christopher about the NYRR Jingle Bell Jog that took place in Brooklyn over the weekend. To be quite honest, I wasn’t really feeling it. I was slightly annoyed that the course had been changed last minute to a 6k (3.7 miles) due to construction in Prospect Park. Alas, I picked up my bib and complimentary sleigh bells thinking that I would feel differently in the morning.That’s when we decided to have some adult beverages. Over a carb-loading pasta dinner and some wine, Chris poised a question to me:

“What if I just timed you in Central Park? You could do the four mile loop and make it your own race?”

The difference with this is that I would be running it alone. I like the camaraderie of seeing friends doing the NYRR races.

That’s when we got on the interwebs.

After texts, gchats and tweets went out, we decided that the Inaugural Baker’s Funtastic 4-Miler Race was to take place in Central Park at 10 AM the next morning.

Over coffee and breakfast on said race day, I told His Lordship that I had construction paper and permanent markers should he want to make race bibs.

Indeed.

We packed up our goods and head to the park. Five competitors met at 72nd Street and East Drive inside Central Park. Chris gave his best Chacha impersonation, giving us rules and regulations.

“Is this the bag drop?,” Susan asked while pointing to my bookbag that laid on the ground next to Chris.

“Sure,” he said.

“Are there aid stations?,” Bojana asked, for she and Elyssa already ran 6 miles and wouldn’t mind a water stop.

“No. And all the water fountains are turned off.”

At the sound of, “GO” we were off running up East Drive. I made the mistake of sprinting toward Cat Hill, for I haven’t raced since Chicago, and that was flat. Miss Greenburg decided to be my rabbit, coaching me through the four miles while keeping me at a faster speed than I have ever raced before. I have never raced a distance shorter than a 10k and was excited to see how I would do with four miles. We made our way up to the reservoir and saw Erica Sara running in the opposite direction. It’s always nice to see familiar faces in your backyard. We charged around the 102 transverse.

“Two miles to go,” Elyssa assured me. “You got this.”

I hardly spoke two words the whole four miles. I only took E’s advice and listened to my feet. We went through the rolling hills on the West Side, and as we came on our final downhill, I felt good enough to only continue at my pace.

That was until Douchey McBaggerson started to get chicked by E and I. Then it was on.

When this type of thing happens, I think back to Claire’s post on road rage in Central Park. It’s not unlike being in a car. You pass someone, said person speeds up and passes you, and it goes back and forth. E passed said guy, and just as I passed him, he started speeding up. I heard his loud footsteps coming up next to me. That’s when I really started pushing it.

CLOMP. CLOMP. CLOMP. CLOMP. ‘Dude, stop pounding the pavement so hard,’ I thought.

We rounded the corner on the 72nd Street transverse. Homeboy kept clomping. I put a silence on him as we got closer to the end.

“Show me what you got,” E said.

I charged up the hill and saw familiar faces making a tunnel at the finish: Susan, Bojana, and Ali!

Finish time was 32:56, a shiny new PR in our first ever rogue race.

Hats off to Miss Greenburg for pushing me through the four miles and giving me good coaching advice. And hats off to my competitors who crushed it in the park. And to His Lordship for making some seriously ghetto race bibs and leaving fellow runners in the park befuddled asking, “Uh..hey, is there a race today?”

Yes, there was. And it won’t be the last.

Fantastic group of five.